people who are against queer headcanoning in the first place are obviously not to be trusted, but people who refuse to tolerate queer headcanons that make fantastic puns are even less so
why are you not up for bisexual Spider-man who swings both ways
or Luke Skywalker, one of the Rebels’ best fighter pilots, aka a flying ace
This is prob the best ask I’ve ever gotten.
oh gosh i miss such thrilling things when i’m asleep, like “enjolras is cruel to eponine”
i bet he was a huge jerk to the Bishop too
and Fantine, what an asshole
i bet he was even a jerk to Petit Gervais
I’m sorry, but did he not steal the Bishops’…Not only did he starve people at the barricades, his naïveté and lack of medical knowledge caused the 1832 cholera epidemic.
I heard that Enjolras has skin as rough as diamonds, breathes fire and sleeps on a pile of gold.
Trufax about Enjolras :
-we’re not safe until he’s dead
-he’ll come stalking us at night
-set to sacrifice our children to his monstrous appetite
-he’ll wreak havoc on our bourgeois if we let him wander free
Enjolras sits inside your head
Enjolras lives among the dead
Enjolras sees you in your bed
And eats you while you’re sleeping
Enjolras did dismember
Cosette, Gavroche, Éponine.
I cannot think why
People still like this guy
When clearly he’s just so darn mean.
Petition to replace the existing genders with up, down, top, bottom, strange and charmed.
And then we’ll even have words for some of the common three-person relationships! (Two up, one down = “proton”.) I like it; it brings the nuclear family into the age of modern particle physics.
it got better